Paying for private school

Tips and tricks for sending your child to private school

Category: Profiles

Reasons people send their children to private school

Recently on a message board I occasionally read, a parent was wondering if they should send their child to private school. So she asked the parents of other private school children if her child would feel poor compared to other families and feel bad about themselves as a result.

One respondent decided to inform the original poster on the real reason they were considering private school:

If it were truly “education” that you care about, your kid would be in a high performing public school. Private school parents care more about the “experience” which is code for “rubbing shoulders with rich people to learn their values and customs and not hard working immigrant values.”

Angry person art

By SmurfyOwn work, Public Domain, Link

Wow, I am glad that respondent cleared it up for them – I bet the parent didn’t even know they were against education!

This kind of shaming response is quite common and the main reason for this web site. Those kind of knee jerk responses assumes that parents send their kids to private school to “rub shoulders with the rich people and learn their customs”.

I attended private schools for 12 years and have paid for a child to attend one nearly as long.

Not once in this time have I seen or heard anyone doing some sort of anthropological study of the ways of the wealthy. Indeed, all the kids attend all the same classes and, at many schools, are required to wear the same clothing (uniforms) to avoid status from being an issue.

Here are the reasons I have actually heard from parents sending their children to private or independent charter schools, as well as home schooling.

  • School matches the families religion
  • Alignment with the family values
  • Specialized learning environment where the private school focused on particular area such as
    • Special needs
    • College preparation
    • Military career preparation schools
    • The arts (dance, theater etc.)
    • An international based education where the child learns the language of their culture (very good for diplomats who will need to return to their country at the end of service)
    • Greek tradition (sports and academic having equal weight)
  • Smaller class size enabling better learning outcomes
  • Additional learning resources are available in some of the private schools – one I know of has Ipads, the other offers horseback riding for kids (apparently it calms the kids who have sensory issues).

I am sure I am missing some. And I would love to hear from any parent that sends their kids to private school to study the culture and norms of wealthy people to learn their ways!

And for everyone else – I do want to assure you that selecting a private school means you are focused on providing a good education for your child. And an educated child becomes an educated adult which benefits all of society. Keep up the great work and sacrifice and thank you.

 

Tips and tricks – the paying for private school links page

We aren’t the only voice out there discussing the details of how to pay for private school. Here are some great reads to help you consider the options and the trade offs:

Broad Brush Tips

Real Life Inspiring Stories

Frank discussion of the trade offs

 

Options Analysis

Have a link that you think will help parents and students? Post a comment so we can include it!

Hero profile: Dorothy Counts

In 1957, Dorothy Counts desegregated an all-white school by being the first person of color to attend. She is still fighting for equal rights for all today.

Private school is about having choices but a valid argument of public school proponents is that the private school system can be used as, or  inadvertantly beome, a  method of discrimination.

In addition to selecting the appropriate education and value system for your child, you have a moral obligation to make sure doing so doesn’t adversely affect other children. Take a close look at the private school your child is attending. If it doesn’t include a diverse student body drawn from the community, connect with other parents and demand a change.  Paying a tuition gives you a powerful voice at your school. More importantly, future parents will want to know about a school that has this problem and did nothing to make it better. Don’t look the other way if your child’s school isn’t diversified.

We are lucky in that our child’s school considers diversity a core value. Use your considerable influence to start the conversation at your school.

“If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor. If an elephant has its foot on the tail of a mouse and you say that you are neutral, the mouse will not appreciate your neutrality.”[1]

Desmond Tutu

[1] https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/d/desmondtut106145.html