Recently on a message board I occasionally read, a parent was wondering if they should send their child to private school. So she asked the parents of other private school children if her child would feel poor compared to other families and feel bad about themselves as a result.
One respondent decided to inform the original poster on the real reason they were considering private school:
If it were truly “education” that you care about, your kid would be in a high performing public school. Private school parents care more about the “experience” which is code for “rubbing shoulders with rich people to learn their values and customs and not hard working immigrant values.”
Wow, I am glad that respondent cleared it up for them – I bet the parent didn’t even know they were against education!
This kind of shaming response is quite common and the main reason for this web site. Those kind of knee jerk responses assumes that parents send their kids to private school to “rub shoulders with the rich people and learn their customs”.
I attended private schools for 12 years and have paid for a child to attend one nearly as long.
Not once in this time have I seen or heard anyone doing some sort of anthropological study of the ways of the wealthy. Indeed, all the kids attend all the same classes and, at many schools, are required to wear the same clothing (uniforms) to avoid status from being an issue.
Here are the reasons I have actually heard from parents sending their children to private or independent charter schools, as well as home schooling.
- School matches the families religion
- Alignment with the family values
- Specialized learning environment where the private school focused on particular area such as
- Special needs
- College preparation
- Military career preparation schools
- The arts (dance, theater etc.)
- An international based education where the child learns the language of their culture (very good for diplomats who will need to return to their country at the end of service)
- Greek tradition (sports and academic having equal weight)
- Smaller class size enabling better learning outcomes
- Additional learning resources are available in some of the private schools – one I know of has Ipads, the other offers horseback riding for kids (apparently it calms the kids who have sensory issues).
I am sure I am missing some. And I would love to hear from any parent that sends their kids to private school to study the culture and norms of wealthy people to learn their ways!
And for everyone else – I do want to assure you that selecting a private school means you are focused on providing a good education for your child. And an educated child becomes an educated adult which benefits all of society. Keep up the great work and sacrifice and thank you.
An hour later the sideboard was now gracing our home instead of headed to the trash heap. Money saving environmentalism.
